Taylor Swift’s engagement shows how intimacy scales in branding. Learn how to build community, connection, and resonance without being a superstar.
Why do we cry over someone else’s milestones
Let me start here: why do millions of people around the world cry over a stranger’s engagement. Why does the internet light up like a family party when a celebrity posts a ring selfie. Why do people act like it was their sister who just said yes. Spoiler: it’s not just fandom, it’s branding.
Just in case you live under a rock, Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce announced her engagement on Instagram:
The thing that hits me the most is that the world didn’t treat it like gossip. It wasn’t just another celebrity headline buried under news scrolls. It felt personal. It felt like your best friend just texted you late at night, blurry selfie, sparkly ring, caps lock “omg I said yes.”
That is the power of intimacy at scale. And you don’t need stadium tours or a diamond the size of a Lego brick to create it. You just need to build your brand like you’re inviting people into your living room instead of performing from a glass tower.
Parasocial sounds creepy but stay with me
In psychology, there’s a term for when people feel like they know someone they’ve never actually met: parasocial relationship. It’s usually used for celebrities or influencers, the sense that you know them because they share so much of themselves publicly.
Now, parasocial can sound manipulative. And in the wrong hands, it absolutely is. But here’s the twist. Parasocial can also be the most human kind of branding if you do it with care. Because it isn’t about tricking people into obsession, it’s about making them feel seen, included, and connected. The difference is intent: performance versus presence.
And here’s the part that people often miss. Parasocial relationships are not just about access. They are about consistency. You cannot just pop into someone’s feed once every six months and expect resonance. You build connection by showing up, again and again, in ways that feel familiar. That is how humans build trust in real life, and it is how brands build trust online.
How Taylor built this with her fans
Taylor didn’t just drop albums from a throne in the sky. She pulled people into her world. She hung out on Tumblr and replied to fans like they were her group chat. She dropped Easter eggs in music videos, not for clout, but because she knows her fans love decoding them: it’s a secret language she speaks with us fans. She baked cookies for fans at her secret sessions. She posts silly cat videos like any of us would. And recently, she nerded out for 30 minutes about sourdough bread while off tour, like a normal person deep in a hobby rabbit hole.
She even pulled fans into her battles. When her masters were stolen, she didn’t just quietly hire a lawyer and retreat. She explained it to us, in plain language, and brought her people into the why behind re recording her entire catalogue. She made it a collective mission, not just her personal pain.
That’s what made the difference. Not just finished products, not just polished perfection, but the messy middle. The unfiltered human choices. The secret language, the callbacks, the symbols. That is what turned strangers into a community who cheer like family.
Why her engagement feels like your best friend’s news
So when Taylor posted her engagement, it didn’t land as “celebrity gossip.” It landed like your best friend’s text. Because over years, she’s been letting people in. Not on everything (boundaries still matter), but on enough that we see her as a human. We know her struggles, her quirks, her routines, her symbols. We’ve walked with her through eras, heartbreaks, re inventions.
So of course the internet lost it. It wasn’t about the ring, it was about the relationship she’s built with us. That’s why brands from Duolingo to Olipop chimed in. That’s why fans cried like it was their cousin at the family reunion. It’s not gossip, it’s intimacy at scale.
And notice this too: the way she announced it. She didn’t sell the exclusive to a glossy magazine cover. She didn’t drop a cinematic black and white reel. She went meme. “Your English teacher and your gym teacher are getting married. 🧨” It is cheeky, inside jokey, familiar. That is exactly what a friend would text in the group chat. That choice of format is a branding lesson in itself. Tone and channel matter as much as the news itself.
The myth of the glossy brand
So many businesses get caught up in the myth of the glossy brand. They think the more polished, the more professional, the better. They strip away quirks, edit out the messy middle, and present a final version that looks flawless but feels hollow. The problem is, people don’t form relationships with perfection. They form relationships with presence. With quirks. With the small, familiar patterns that make you feel safe.
Taylor’s brand has always been full of quirks. The numerology, the Easter eggs, the self aware lyrics, the fandom in jokes. None of it is necessary for the music to sell. But it is essential for the brand to resonate. Because those quirks are what make people feel like insiders. And insiders stay invested.
If your brand feels like it has to be endlessly glossy, you rob yourself of the chance to build intimacy. People don’t want you to be flawless. They want you to be human enough that they can see themselves in you. They want to feel like they belong in your story, not like they are standing outside looking in.
What this means for your brand
Now here’s the part that matters for you. No, you do not need to be a global superstar to build this kind of resonance. You don’t need 280 million followers or a press team. What you need is intention. And the courage to be a little messy.
Invite people into your messy middle. Do not only show the polished launch or the perfect website screenshot. Share the behind the scenes, the doubts, the learning curves, the drafts that felt cringe but led to breakthroughs. People want to see how you make the sausage (or the sourdough). They want to feel part of the process, not just the end result.
Use symbols and arcs. Taylor has her friendship bracelets, her callbacks, her eras. Those rituals make people feel like insiders. What are your motifs. Maybe it is a phrase you always use, maybe it is your coffee mug that sneaks into every video, maybe it is the cat who supervises your design calls. Those small repeated symbols become emotional anchors. They remind people, oh this feels familiar, I belong here.
Think community, not audience. Followers are numbers. Community is connection. Post like you are updating friends, not pitching strangers. Taylor’s engagement caption wasn’t polished PR speak. It was a meme level inside joke. Warm, accessible, human. That’s what makes people feel like they are in the group chat, not outside the glass.
Heads Up! If you’re a business owner and also a Swiftie, I made you a little something: take my Taylor Swift Eras Brand Quiz to discover which “era” your brand is in and get personalized insights. 🫶🏻
I know, being vulnerable is terrifying.
I literally wrote the article, I know the stuff. And still, I find it difficult to share vulnerabilities online. Because being vulnerable is the bravest thing you can do on the internet. You are not just sharing with your bubble of kind people. You are exposing yourself to strangers, and if your post goes viral, you could face hate. That is terrifying.
So if you are struggling with vulnerability, I get it. I still struggle too. Sometimes I overshare and feel exposed, sometimes I shut down like a hedgehog and disappear. The line between what is personal and what is private is hard to draw. But it is essential.
Here is the trick I use: make a list of what is personal and what is private. Personal means it is yours but shareable: your coffee order, your love of plants, the way you parent without putting your kid’s face online. Private means it is yours but protected: the things you do not want the internet to touch. Keeping that distinction clear gives you freedom to be vulnerable without being overexposed.
Because building community does not mean spilling every detail of your life. It means sharing enough that people feel like they know you, while protecting the parts of yourself that are sacred. Taylor does this too. She gives us symbols, quirks, stories, but there are still boundaries she holds.
So let me remind you of this: you can create intimacy and still keep yourself safe. You can share your messy middle without putting your whole soul on stage. You can let people in without losing yourself.
That is the balance. That is how you build a brand that feels like family without turning your life into a performance.
Because intimacy, bestie, scales better than perfection ever could.
